When dining out, you should be true to luscious living by learning and enforcing the right standards. It shows respect to your host, the venue, your fellow diners, as well as some self-respect.

Frockage

• Know what the appropriate dress code is for the venue you are attending. Ask your host or ring the restaurant to find out if you are unsure. It is poor form to turn up to a 5-star restaurant in jeans and a T-shirt when you should be in a dinner suit/cocktail frock.
• If you arrive wearing a coat or jacket, pass it to the waiter before you sit at the table. Don't throw it over the back of a chair - it is bound to trip someone over and also is not good for keeping the quality of the garment.
• Handbags should be placed neatly at your feet or under the table, beside the legs of your chair, but without affecting the others sitting at your table. It will be safer for both the passing staff and fellow guests if your bag is out of the way, and it also reduces the chance of being swiped off the back of the chair when you aren't paying attention (ie. it's bit harder for a thief to crawl under your seat).
• See what Wikipedia has to say about dress codes, or read this article about dress codes at Chastity St James' Guide to Modern Etiquette.
  

Napkins

• Keep your serviette on your lap for you where it should remain for the duration of your dinner. When the time comes to leave the restaurant, you may place it on the table. If you make a trip to the bathroom during thr meal, neatly place your serviette on your seat - your fellow diners will not want to stare at your dirty cloth in your absence.
• Dab your serviette around your mouth as you eat and do not, at any moment, wipe your mouth. Be kind to other guests by discreetly alerting them to any food left in inappropriate places, especially teeth or on ties.
• To learn more about the napkin vs serviette debate, read the summary from Wikipedia or just see how Martha (a "napkin" lady) would do it, with this article about "Three Napkin Folds" and some tips for laundering your linen napkins.

Cutlery

• Seeing a multitude of knives and forks in front of you can be daunting, but the use of each is actually quite simple. As a general rule, always work from the outside in and never use the same cutlery for different courses.
• If you are still confused by the order of use, hold back a few moments and follow your fellow diners; this will also appear respectful and polite.
• What would Martha do? Check out her "Setting the table 101" article. It includes a video and specific pictures of each type of glass, plate and cutlery so you can study before you head off to a fancy meal with multiple courses! 

Ordering drinks

• Traditionally, men took to role of ordering wine (and paying the bill) but these days it should probably go to the person who knows the best about wine (including a discussion with the rest of the table about preferences and budget sensitivity).
• If you know that it will you be making the decisions, you may want to consider visiting the restaurant's website or ringing them beforehand for their advice and to get some prior knowledge about what's on offer. It will make you a better host and speed up the process if you have some choices narrowed down already.
• The staff are there to help you and will know what would go best with the food you are ordering. Don't be embarrassed to ask for assistance.
• Another idea if to ask choose your meals and ask the sommelier to choose to suit (but beware that this will no doubt put the price up).
• As a basic rule, champagne is great to start the meal, white wine or a light red such as a pinot is best for entrée (as well as with chicken, seafood or pastas) while a red wine is best to be paired with your heavier main course or red meats.
• Here's an article from Wine Weekly about how to order wine in a restaurant which may also help. The Wine Society also has a piece on wine education.
  

Consuming drinks

• To taste the wine, swirl it in your glass gently and smell, followed by a small sip. If the wine does not taste right, be confident in saying so or ask for the waiter’s opinion. You do not have to endure an awful bottle of wine for the table out of politeness.
• Use a different glass for each course of wine. The waiter should organise this, especially if you switch from white to red wines.
  
• Keep track of your alcohol intake and always drink a glass of water for every glass of wine.
• Check out Lettie Teague's piece called "Everything in Moderation" in Food and Wine.

The meal

• When you have decided what you wish to order, close your menu and place it on the table in front of you.  This is a signal to your wait staff that you are ready to order.
• Break bread with your fingers, use a knife for butter, or fingers for dipping into olive oil, and always use the plate to the left of you.
• It is important to always wait until all meals have been delivered to the table before you commence eating.  This shows respect and equality among your fellow diners.
• Always place the food, in small bite size quantities, on the arch of your fork to eat. Luscious-ites never shovel their food!
• If there is something wrong with the meal you ordered, politely mention it to your waiter and see what they can do about it. This is not the time to make a scene and embarass anyone.
• Learn more from this StafChefs.com article about restaurant etiquette called "Getting our manners back in shape" by James Feustel and Amy Tarr.

Paying the bill

• It can be helpful to know who will be paying the bill before you go to dinner but of course this isn't always possible. If it was your suggestion to dine out (or if you chose an expensive venue) and you want to pay for everyone, then make it clear from the start and lead the way with the ordering (eg. if you order entree, main and dessert, then your guests will feel more comfortable about also ordering the same amount - it gives them an idea of where things stand).
• When you are determined to pay, you can organise this in advance with the restaurant by giving them your credit card details before your arrive. Then when the bill is mentioned, you can simply say, "it's all sorted' and move the conversation along.
• If you come expecting to pay for your own meal and contribute to the drinks, then try to bring both cash (in a mix of denominations) and credit cards to the dinner to pay. While cash is best if the group is splitting the bill, card is by far the more sophisticated method.
• If someone offers to pay, accept graciously but offer to put in a tip. Don't be greedy and order everything off the menu or the most expensive items. You will not be invited out again.
• For a work meal, it is generally accepted that the senior person will pay (especially as they might have an expense account) but don't count on this - bring your own money with you to be safe.
• Here are some more tips about picking up the tab from FineLiving.com.

Tipping

• It is not necessary to tip in all establishments but if you have been really satisfied with your meal and wait staff, 10% of the bill is an adequate amount to add (but this depends on which country you are in - the US, for example can be more like 15-20%).
• This can either be in cash or added onto your credit card payment - it can be nice to ask the staff discreetly about this because some venues take the tips and divide them between all staff, whilst others will give it straight to the person you intended it for (and some places may not share the tip at all!).
  

Restaurant staff

• If you think your party will be late, please ring the restaurant and give them a true idea of what time you will be arriving. You should also call if you know the numbers have changed (don't arrive with a booking for two people and expect them to accommodate six with no notice), or if there are any specific requests.
• Always be polite and friendly with the staff - they are there to help you enjoy a lovely culinary experience not be slaves to arrogance and ego. Asking the front-of-house staff to pass on your thanks to the kitchen staff is also a nice gesture.
• Do not ever click your fingers or call out to a waiter to get their attention. It is their job to keep an eye on their patrons and if they haven't managed to anticipate your needs, they are usually busy and will get to you as soon as they can. If there is too much of a delay, you should quietly get up from your table and approach someone at the front desk or bar to ask for assistance.
• If you have just popped in for a coffee and it's nearing meal time, don't use up a table for four and stay for hours. It's just not luscious.

Keep yourself nice: lipstick and glassware

• Avoid getting lipstick on your glass by using a straw (if drinking a cocktail), by blotting your lips with a tissue beforehand, using a lip primer which helps hold the lipstick to your lips rather than anything else such as glassware and flatware, and apply a thin layer of Vaseline or clear lip gloss over the top.
• Another tip which does actually work but requires some practice, is to lip the rim of the glass with your lips to create a moist barrier between your lipstick and your glass. It sounds rather unglam and should NOT be done unless mastered quickly and seemlessly!
• If you do get lipstick on your glass, do not worsen the situation by continuing the look all around the rim - keep drinking from the already soiled area of the rim.
• It is unfortunate to have to stare at a woman over dinner who has the lip liner rim and no lipstick - it's like a bad drag queen. So don't allow this to happen to you - excuse yourself at a suitable moment to reapply your lipstick (Luscious ladies should always have luscious lips), check for potential items between your teeth and powder your nose (and forehead).

General rules to remember at all times

• Sit up straight and do not project your voice too loudly across the table. You may be at a restaurant to enjoy times with your friends and colleagues, but not everyone else at the venue wants to know your intimdate secrets.
• Try not to lean your elbows on the table. If you find it comfortable, place your forearms on the edge of the table in front of you for support.
• Remember what your mother taught you, and never speak with your mouth full of food.
• Put your phone on silent or vibrate.
• See also Michael Shmith's A to Z of Restaurant Etiquette article in The Age as well as this article from Gourmet-Food-Revolution.

Enjoy your luscious dining! 

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Welcome to Sparkle School – the etiquette of enjoying every Luscious lady’s beverage of choice and the ultimate celebratory tipple: Champagne.

Do serve chilled – Ideally place your bottle in the fridge 2-3 hours before pouring. However, if there is a need for rapid chilling (good day/bad day) then place your bottle in an ice bucket filled with half water, half ice for twenty minutes.

Do drink your champagne from crystal glasses – their rougher texture encourages more of those special little bubbles of nothing. We love the range from Waterford, particularly the Lismore Jewels Amethyst Toasting Flute. Visit www.waterford.com for more.

Do always hold your champagne glass by the stem so as not to warm your bubbly, plus it prevents finger print smudges on your flute.

Do keep the wire around the cork when opening the bottle. Keep a firm hand on the cork and tip the bottle on a 45-degree angle, then turn the base of the bottle to loosen the cork.

Don’t put ice-cubes in your champagne – it dilutes the taste. If you want to enjoy your bubbly even colder though, try our Champagne Cocktail.

Don’t add fruit – If you must have your toast with strawberries, serve them in a bowl on the side.

Don’t let your glass overflow – what a terrible waste of bubbles. When pouring, hold the base of the bottle in one hand and tilt your glass a little with the other. Pour a little into the glass and wait for the fizz to settle before topping up the glass.

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Oyster Bay wine ‘Sometimes’ moments

We now have even more reason to love the fabulous zesty wines of Oyster Bay with their very-luscious coaster cards that have been popping up in bars. Featuring quotes that begin with “Sometimes…” the coasters are to remind us of moments in life that are truly special.

Oyster Bay have also added a “Sometimes” section to their website where you can share your most-memorable experiences with Oyster Bay – a moment or special occasion you shared with a loved one or friends that stands out in your mind. 

You can add your Sometimes story and read the delightful stories of other people who appreciate the same vivacious wine and the same “sometimes” moments that we share.

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Melbourne’s extravagant bar The Spice Market in Melbourne, Australia is the perfect new hotspot for drinks with a new date.

The impressively large subterranean space located under Melbourne’s Grand Hyatt is not just another bespoke Melbourne Laneway bar and provides an exotic and sensual ambience where the everyday routine of life can be left behind.

Crowds of candle-holding Buddas greet you as you enter into an atmosphere that is sexy and fascinating. Its opulent interior is awash with Asian antiques, exotic furnishings, decadent lounges, glass mosaic tables, Thai statues, colourful trappings and fabrics and masses of illuminated birdcages that hang from the ceiling – all of which have been collected by the owners during their years of travel.

Like the dazzling décor, the cuisine also takes its inspiration from the traditional spice route that tracked the journey between the Middle East and Asia. The mezze menu offers some tempting tapas including Turkish pizzas from the stone oven.

The energised space consisits of varied seating including private Shanghai lounges for banquets as well as interesting indoor courtyard areas, one featuring a tiled fountain, designed to resemble a Jemaa el Fna coutyard in Marrakech.

After dinner move on to the thirty metre long bar to enjoy cocktails such as The Spice Market’s signature Turkish Delight Martini or a Mongoloian Mojito.

Glamorous, spacious and well worth getting frocked up for, The Spice Market is a magic carpet ride adding another dimension to the concept of Melbourne laneway bars.

Beaney Lane off Russell Street (Grand Hyatt), Melbourne VIC 3000
Ph: (03) 9660 3777

Visit www.thespicemarket.net.au for more information.

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Learn more about cooking with spices and MIddle Eastern cuisine.

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See also our Red Hill, Mornington Peninsula article in Culture Vulture, as well as our Luxe Travel section.

Check out our other Social Butterfly sections:

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